Too many thoughts

My head has been buzzing with too many thoughts. Once again I am having trouble sleeping.

I initially started this blog so I could get things off my mind and lead a less stressful life, but I think I forgot how to do that recently.

Other than my husband, children and in-laws, I have no contact with my family. Why is this? Well, some I do not want to talk with, some I wish I could and others are lost in limbo. Why do some not call or visit me? Am I so unlikeable, have I chased away everyone?

I feel abandoned.

My girls are starting to forget, they mix up some relatives with others relations and friends. It's sad.

This all may sound dramatic, there are some family I see/talk/chat on a regular basis but most have grown very distance.

The one that hurts the most is my Mother, she is the one relation that reads this blog, I post the pictures for her, but she does not respond. I am the cause for much hurt but am I to be forgotten because of it? I am still here, I still love. I am hurting too.