Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Post #13

I'm so very tired of snow, I think this is the most snow we've had in the past 10 years, I'm ready for it to be over!

I went to the third Change Ways meeting today, the topic was 'The role of your Social Life' which I do not have and I have lots of difficulties making and keeping friends. I need more intimate/close friends, I only seem to have friends and acquaintances, I don't know how to get closer to people and share private things with them. whenever I do get close to people they either let me down or move away or I get sick of them and push them away....I sometimes catch myself doing that with Hubby, and I hate that I do it. when I tried to explain that social nicities don't come very easy to me the other ladies protested, they said I'm always nice and polite and when I worked at the store I was always pleasent and a good listenern. BUT that was usually just a show, Because I smile and listen doesn't mean underneith is the same, I never knew how to carry a conversation, how to express how I'm feeling, it was always easier just to smile and look happy.

The other topic today was 'Assertive Communication'. I've been trying to work on being assertive for several years now, I'm too passive in public and too aggressive with family, it's very hard to balance the two. The ladies at group were surprised when it was my turn to share this because they only knew the happy smileing leslie from the store and not the angry yellin bitch I can be. On the flip side BJ (the other young mom in the group that I was apprehensive about her joining) is the complete opposit of me, she is confident and aggressive in public but passive and a push over with her we both need to find the happy there one?

After the meeting and lunch with Grandma P. I went to Dr. W to have the bandage changed. And here is a very blurry pic of the grafts. The dark purple thing is the graft that was taken from my wrist, it looks much better then last week. Tom, my physio guy told me yesterday that the graft is supposed to help the flesh under it to make new skin not to actually replace the skin removed, the graft will eventually die and fall away. This was a big relief to know, now why couldn't the Doc say it that way? The pink part that is under the purple part is the flap graft that was origanially the side of my pinkie, it is outlined in black scab but it is looking very well. It's very weird to see my finger so fat, looks more like a thumb then my pinkie, Dr. DG said it would be fat for 6+ months. It's a relief to be finally on the mend.

Anna went to bed before 6pm tonight. She is always picking on her big sis and back talking, I had enough of it, I put her in her crib for a timeout and when I went back 5 mins later she said she was tired and wanted to say goodnight to daddy. So she said goodnight and went back to bed in her clothes and without a bottle, 10 mins later she was out. She hasn't been have naps for over a week now, it was always a fight to get her to sleep for a nap and then she'd be up late at night because she wasn't tired. So I stopped fighting her and let her do without a nap and she's been going to bed at 8pm and sleeps all night. It's been wonderful! But I think having no naps is catching up with her, she does seem to be getting crankier in the evenings. What am I to do? Hopefully Anna won't get up too early in the morn...I kinda forgot about that.....oh well.

Play group tomorrow and then Cooking club on Friday, this week is going fast.

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